How straight?
Just a little chart over the queerness of the
characters. I first got the idea when I decided I was too lazy to
attach all those pictures in an e-mail, and instead just stick
them up on a site instead, and then I decided to make it public,
too! So I just added some more pictures, and here we are!
Anyway, this was for my dear cousin Tone, who claimed the entire
male part of the cast (James, Butch, Ash, Brock, Tracey and
Todd... not Gary, funny as it is) were gay. I decided to scare
her even more, and planned mailing her some pictures from the
famous "Holiday at Acapuolco (or however that's spelled),
but then, as I said, realized this was too much for one single
mail. So this is for her, and all you who know what I'm rambling
on about, to enjoy.
Most of the pictures were from Painted Memories,
but the ones from Pikachu Revolts (they have littel white
"6" in the upper corners) are from Together Forever.
(What is written in italic is just my own little comments to her
in Norwegian, or to get even closer, our local accent. So don't
bother trying to get much out of it anyway)
Ash: Tracey I love you!
Tracey: Ash I love you too!
Both: Yaaaay! We found true love!
I know, I know *sighs*. But the first thing that entered my mind
was that it was some sort of bad confession of true love.
Sure, Brock likes girls. Sure, it doesn't take him anything to
get over them again. Sure, Brock is a soft man who enjoys doing
housework in a frilly pink appron. Sure, Brock is not in the
closet.
Ah, Cassidy and Jesse, who used to be friends, but now are bitter
enemies, reasons unknown. It's soooo obvious!
"With that hair he HAS to be gay" -
Tone
"Is it a boy or a girl?" - Eili, a
classmate of mine. Who, by the way, claimed that she was happy
the real world isn't like Pokèmon, because if so all boys would
be homosexual and all girls would be monsters.
Officer Jenny (all of them) must be the most naive cop I've ever
seen. Then there is also the fact that I have my own little
theories about why they never accept Brock's pleads for love (of
course he's a blabbering idiot too, but you know what I mean.).
And that Cassidy is a woman who knows what to do to make Jenyn
trust her...
[Det e en av kvær Konstabel Jenny
(politihora) i kvær by (dæm e søstre å søskenbarn å
svigerinne å gud vet ka meir, å Brock, han som ikke har øya
(bilde nedafor) e VÆLDI forelska i dæm. Mæn han får dæm
aldri. Nokka som sikkert e like greit.]
And yet another Jenny picture! God, Brock needs help...
Sure, it probably makes sense when in a story. But I don't know
that story, and I think Ash looks really eager about whatever
Brock just said to him...
"She used to hang around me because I was so
beautiful." Way to give it away, Jesse...
["Hun pleide å henge rund meg, hun var
sjalu fordi jeg var så nydelig!"
Jess, ho me det røe håre SA faktisk det...]
The famous palletshippy scene... did Ash ever hold Misty that
way?
Todd looks like the biggest moron ever here. Tone thought he was
gay too.
[Todd e jæveln me dein røe t-skjorta]
Prima, anybody? (God help us all, her bust scares me...) I think
that was the first time Misty bothered blushing when her
friends embarrased her...
Misty and Tracey watching Prima battle. Notice the hearts? That
convinced me...
Okay, this was actully before she met Prima, here she's
just telling Ash how great she is. I rest my case...
When this picture is bigger it doesn't look like Tracey is
gawking shamelessly on her tits. I mean, he probably is,
but it wasn't that obvious on the larger picture. And Misty's not
only impressed by her chest either.
[seriøst, lillehora me dein syke sveisn va
faen me totalt på knærne ætter ho me dæm svære puppan. Det
va skummelt å se på!]
Perhaps the age difference is a bit too big, but it's still sort
of... I don't know...
With the hairstyle from a forgotten past when men used eyeliner,
cheerleaders he didn't give a damn about and... just being who he
is, Gary doesn't leave much doubt about his preferences...And
aren't Umbreon's just the cooles?!
[Seriøst, viss nån e homse så e de han...
hockeysveis?!]
Just his appearance... pink bandana, baggy t-shirts and red
shorts? And not too mention the love of science, the female name,
the passion for drawing (and no other hobbies) and the fact that
he most of the time acts like the biggest pushover of the
history...Poor Tracey is too feminine for his own good...
Not to forget his "hero", Professor Oak...
Here he's informing Misty about how great he is
And here he's meeting him. Poor, poor, poor Tracey, who can't see
what is for his own good... (now, I have planned to get something
on with Oak just to get his money, but I think it's more than
that with our darling pokèmon watcher. And my plans involved
seducing Tracey too anyway...)
[Det e litn nøtte i å nækte for at det
virke som om Tracey stakkar ikke bare beundre gamle perverse
Professor Oak...]
And isn't he just DAMN cute here? Okay, let's go on...
Okay, Meowth had a crush on Cassandra, female and human, and
during this episode he was high on Shuckle potion or whatever,
but still... isn't it a bit suspicious that he fell for James?!
It's not like he's in drag or anything either...(this is
disgusting)
This is the one and only neoshippy proof (Butch looks jealous
because James is clinging to his partner). But if we twist it, is
he the only one jealous because of it? Jesse sure doesn't look
too happy about it, but is that because James isn't paying
attention to her or because he is paying attention to Cassidy?...
or maybe Butch is wishing it was him James was clinging
to instead? It makes just as much sense as everything else!
[Neoshipping = truen på at Butch å Cassidy (dæm me svarte
klær) e et par]
And now, what you all waited for... James!
His hands... look at the way he's holding his hands! (Am I the
only one reactino on stuff like that?)
This one's classic... and damn does he look good in that dress?
Yep, it's James. That is just scary...
Cute? Yes. I'm sure he enjoyed it a lot.
"The flaming Moltres!"
Holiday at acapuolco... that must've been the best
episode ever.
[Nope, den blei ikke seindt andre plassa ænn
i Japan. Vel, dæm seinte den i USA ætter at folk
klaga, mæn da kutta dæm de scenan me han fyrn i bikini.]
This is what I meant, Sara, (if you see this)... They are HOW
much larger than Jesse's?!
Jesse looks sort of annoyed here... but why? I don't know,
actually... or maybe she just wants get him in private as fast as
possible (oh god, my brain is corrupted...)
So? Did you enjoy it? Want to give me more examples? Want to tell
me they are not gay? Want to... well, want to say anything at
all? I have a mail,
you know...